Even when the source data is ideal – a party, you’re beautiful, he relaxed – start dating is not so simple as to exchange views from different parts of the room. It does not matter who takes this step. You can sit passively and hope for the best, but you can come up, break the ice between you and add it to your glass. BuzzyWall has collected several simple and effective ways to start a conversation.
1. Ask the question
Let’s start with the most laid-back method – the question. It allows you not to declare from the threshold that you are interested in the person himself, and not the subject of your conversation.
Avoid deadlock issues, such as “where is the toilet?” And closed – to which you can answer “yes” or “no”. Think of something positive to immediately ask your communication the right tone. For example, if you have common friends, ask how he got to know them.
2. Take a look
Observation is a less aggressive way to start a conversation than a question. This is a rhetorical remark. If he supports it – fine, consider that dating has begun, if not – you just go on and will not look like the failed task of the pickup.
Try not to blurt out something too obvious: “Today is Tuesday.” Pay attention to what is happening around: “Do not eat this salad, I saw how vodka was spilled in it”, “X went for a guitar, it seems like dances are being cancelled for today”.
3. Say a compliment
A compliment is like a gift: everyone loves to receive it, but it will easily distinguish a trinket bought on sale for someone, and a thing chosen for a particular person.
Try to praise the detail, and not get off with a general phrase. The rolling in the spirit of “You have a beautiful smile” often look like vulgarity. Talk about yourself: “I like your shirt.” So you say things that concern you both.
4. Tell a story
The story for dating should be funny and short. You want to attract attention quickly, but do not be obtrusive. Save the tragic revelations about the funeral of the pet until the second, no – the third date.
A good story gives many more reasons for developing a conversation than a question or an observation. Ideally, it should concern you and your mutual friend, then she will certainly be interested. Although there are no strict rules to the topic and ready templates cannot be, act on the situation.
5. Say hello to you
This may seem obvious, but sometimes it is enough to say “hello” and smile. This you are clearly saying: a nice guy, look here, I already took the first step.
The main thing is not to greet you from the far end of the room or pass by, otherwise, it’s just a courtesy, not an invitation to talk.
6. Attract an intermediary
Why else should you go to a party with friends, if they do not help you feel more confident? Ask a friend or friend to introduce you to the object of sympathy. If you do not have common acquaintances, keep a girlfriend with you just for courage to come and talk to a stranger. Just make sure that she correctly understands her role and will not pull all the attention to herself.
Any of these tricks can look like a casual way to start a conversation or as an absurd tackle from a comedy about a loser. It all depends on your behavior. If you want to please people, follow these tips and do not allow typical mistakes that people make at the beginning of communication:
Be natural. You can not think up a funny story – do not try, do not want to pretend that you like his shirt – do not. You can even say that he has a monstrous taste, and hope that this guy has a sense of humor. Sincerity works better than any proven behavior.
Watch your movements. Smile, open pose – not to be confused with the available – a straight back will say more than the information in the profile on the dating site.
Keep your confidence. Nothing extraordinary happens, so be simple. If the conversation does not stick together or the guy turns out to be a jerk – you will have something to laugh at with your friends. There is nothing shameful in showing sympathy.